Forever Alone
by FalconPunchTime
Summary: Loki knew Tony never meant anything he did or said when he was drunk, he knew deep down Tony loved him. But sometimes he regretted being with the genius, especially when he put him down. Especially when he hit him, but Loki never left him. frostiron, tony and loki yaoi, abuse, rape, OOC story
1. Chapter 1

Loki knew Tony never meant anything he did or said when he was drunk, he knew deep down Tony loved him. But sometimes he regretted being with the genius, especially when he put him down. Especially when he hit him, but Loki never left him.

****Loki walked into SHIELD alone, they all knew he wasn't into trying to take over the world anymore. He quietly took a seat next to Bruce, they were having another meeting.

"Where's Tony?" Natasha asked, Loki frowned.

"Asleep, and hungover." Loki muttered back, he slowly rubbed his cheek. Tony had punched him when he had come home the night before. Loki had cried but gotten himself together, and hastily covered it in cover up before he left the house. He did that with all his visible bruises, no one had to worry about him. Loki could help himself.

"I know-*HICCUP*-that you-you're cheating on me with Steve! You're a whore! Get on your fucken hands and knees!" Tony screamed at a crying, shaking, and scared Loki. It was three in the morning, and Tony had stormed into the house convinced Loki was cheating on him. He had hit, slapped, kicked, and even spat on Loki. And he still screamed at him, Loki wiped his tears.

"Tony! I swear I'm not-"

"Stop fucken with me! You heard me! On the bed!" Loki complied with Tony, he didn't want to hurt his fiancee anymore in that state. Tony didn't seem to hear Loki's screams as he had sex with him, all night.

Loki walked into SHIELD with a very visible limp the next day, he tried his best not to raise suspicions but it didn't exactly work out.

"Where's Tony?" Fury asked as soon as he walked into the door, Loki gave a faint smile. The pain almost making tears fall down his face.

"Home, he doesn't feel well."

Loki knew Tony had sex with other people, it just couldn't be her out of all people. At least strangers came and went, and he never saw them again. But Loki always saw her, and she never had any regrets hurting him. Loki hated it, but if Tony wanted to do that he could.

He was having sex with Pepper Potts, and Loki tried his hardest to ignore it. Even though it was always in 'their' bed, if Loki could call it that anymore. She always had that smirk on when she would walk in with Tony to their house and be lead to their bedroom. It seems that she always tried extra hard to make Loki hear their sounds of pleasure in the bed Loki slept in every night.

Loki never said a word about it, because he would always love Tony. No matter what he did.

Thor easily noticed his brother as he walked alone into SHIELD for who knows how many times in the past few months. He knew Tony had been getting drunk, but he didn't know any more than that. He saw a wave of sadness surrounding Loki as he walked in, his face expressionless. "Good morning brother!" Thor had greeted him, getting up to hug him.

Loki gave a fake smile, Thor didn't see through it though. "Morning Thor, nice to see you." The two hugged and Loki was on his way.

Loki sat on the toilet in the bathroom stall, the small baggie filled to the brim. It had all started when Tony had told him, "Maybe I wouldn't sleep with Pepper if you weren't so fat!" And Loki took it to heart, he had started taking laxatives to lose the weight faster. He had been using them for about two weeks, and Tony still said he was fat. Loki had the false hope that Tony would love him more if he lost the weight. Even though the Norse God was practically a stick he believed every word Tony said. He believed it was all true.

Natasha had been the first to notice Loki not walking straight, the way he avoided anything but water at the cafeteria. Always claiming 'he had eaten a rather large breakfast'. The large amounts of time Loki spent in the bathroom, and the multiple times he left to use the bathroom itself. She had told Clint her suspicions of Loki being anorexic, and he had knocked it off. She next had told Bruce, he agreed with her suspicions. They kept the thoughts to just the two of them, and further observed Loki each day. Always ending up being more worried.

Loki walked into their house one day, only to see Pepper about to leave. "Hey Loki, he was a great fuck by the way." She laughed and left their house, Tony ran out of their room hearing Loki shut and lock the door.

"Loki! We ran out of beer! Go and get some more for me!" Tony said with a smile, Loki smiled.

"Sure thing Tony." He said putting back on his coat, he ran back into his car to get more beer for Tony.

Loki never expected it to be pouring outside, he had run into the beer distributer knowing his cover up had smeared and probably was coming off. He hadn't expected anyone he knew to be there, no one ever was. Until he became face to face with Clint, Natasha, Steve, and Bruce.

"Loki, what are you- FUCK! What happened with your eye!?" Steve screamed out, Loki shook it off.

"I just fell down some stairs, got beaten up pretty bad. It'll heal in good time." He laughed, Natasha wasn't buying it.

"Why do you have three cases of beer?" She immediately asked back, Loki smiled.

"Tony ran out, and asked me to get him some more."

"Loki, have you lost weight recently?" Bruce said out of nowhere, Loki frowned.

"Not that I believe of, why?"

"Nothing, you just seem skinnier... For some weird reason."

"I should get going, bye!" Loki ran to the registers, paid, and sped back to Tony. "Tony! I'm back!" He screamed, walking into their house. It was pitch black, Loki found a lightswitch and snapped it on. Tony sat in the kitchen, alone. "Tony, I brought you more beer." Loki said smiling, Tony turned.

"What took you so long!?" He screamed, bitter feelings in his voice.

"I ran into Natasha, Clint, Bruce, and Steve. We simply chatted for a few min-"

"Don't fucken lie to me Loki! I know you met up with Steve and had a quick fuck with him! Probably in a bathroom stall too! You whore!" The words stung Loki, he started crying.

"Tony, I swear! I didn't ever have sex with him!"

Before he knew it Tony had slapped him again on the cheek, "WHORE! ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES NOW!"

Loki obliged and went on his hands and knees, before he knew Tony had thrown both their pants off. "WHORE! HUH! YOU LIKE THAT! STOP FUCKEN CRYING OR I'LL REALLY GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT!" Loki stopped the tears falling down his face, finally Tony finished with him. "I'm going to see Pepper, I'm taking the beer with me. Get yourself cleaned up, and call Steve. I'm sure you can stay with him for the night so you don't get lonely." Tony ran out of their house, slamming shut the front door.

****Loki ran upstairs into their bathroom, tears wildly running down his face. Loki grabbed Tony's sleeping pills, he swallowed a handful. He slumped next to the toilet, half naked and crying. He knew Tony wouldn't miss him, no one would. Loki was forever alone, he always would be.


	2. Chapter 2

Thor slammed open the doors to Tony's house, Natasha, Clint, Steve, and Bruce behind him. Pieces of furniture tilted or thrown littered the floor, broken glasses all over the kitchen. "Loki! Stark!" Thor shouted, suddenly Tony and Pepper ran out to the living room. Tony only in his red boxers, Pepper in Tony's shirt and underwear.

"Does Loki know about this?" Natasha spat, Pepper looked mortified.

"We can't find Loki." Those four words were enough for Thor, who suddenly darted upstairs. The Avengers swiftly followed after him followed by Pepper, Thor was beating on a door.

"Stark, why does this door not open?!" Thor demanded to know, Tony sighed.

"Ah, don't tell me he locked himself in the bathroom again. Loki! Loki darling! Come on out!" Tony said knocking on the door, no response. "Dammit Loki, stop acting like a bitch!" Tony screamed, earning Thor holding him up by his collar.

"You do not use that type of talk with my brother, Stark." He commanded, Tony gulped.

"JARVIS, unlock the bathroom door." Tony commanded.

"Door unlocked sir."

Natasha pushed her way to the front of the group, she suddenly gasped. "Someone call an ambulance!" The rest of the Avengers rushed in, Tony struck silent.

"Brother!" Thor screamed, tears streamed down the Norse God's eyes.

"Thor...Is that really you?" A voice said low, Thor looked down. Loki tried to get up, but he just started falling. Steve grabbed him, earning a glare from Tony.

"Yes brother, what did you take to get into this state?" Thor was very concerned in his brother at the moment, Loki gave a faint smile.

"Just some sleeping pills to help me get to sleep. Guess I took a little too many." Loki fake laughed, Natasha and Bruce gave each other a look.

"Loki, can we talk to you privately." Natasha hissed, eyeing Bruce. The three left the bathroom, they sat in one of Tony's many bedrooms.

Loki gulped as he took a seat, "What's wrong Bruce and Natasha?" He asked, another fake smile taking over his face.

"Cut the crap Loki, you have more scars than yesterday on your face. Oh, and can you put some pants on?" Natasha said.

Loki turned bright red, he ran to another room. He came back wearing gray sweatpants, Bruce sighed.

"Loki, has Tony been..." Bruce didn't know how to say it, he wanted to be direct, but not too out there.

Luckily Natasha had already thought of a way of expressing it, "Has Tony been abusing you? We're only worried about you Loki, and he's cheating on you with-"

"Pepper." Loki finished low, wiping tears from his eyes.

"You knew?" Bruce asked in shock, Loki sighed.

"For a while now, but if Tony's happy I'm happy." Natasha was in shock, how could the god of mischief go this low for someone. Someone who was hurting him not only physically but mentally.

"What?" Natasha said, Loki looked directly in her eyes.

"Tony doesn't mean all those words, but either why most of them are truth. And I love Tony, so if he's happy I'll keep at it."

"Tony has been cheating on you, and hitting you. Loki, you tried to kill yourself with his drugs if you don't recall."

Loki's smile fell, "It was a stupid impulse, okay."  
"But it was for a reason Loki." Bruce countered, Loki sighed.  
"Yeah, it was. And I regret it, okay? But at the time it just seemed right, after everything he did and told me. I couldn't deal with it anymore, but I'm better now. It takes a lot more than a handful of sleeping pills to kill a Norse God."  
"What happened last night that made you do that?" Natasha asked, Loki looked down at the ground.  
"JARVIS, show them the video of last night." Loki said to Tony's AI, JARVIS immediately answered back.  
"Yes sir."  
The footage shocked both Bruce and Natasha, they saw the vivid rape of the night before. How Pepper talked to Loki, the fraud assumptions of Loki having sex with Steve. And how Tony left him on the floor and left, and how Loki had run upstairs to the bathroom and took the pills. No matter how much Loki denied it he had attempted suicide.  
"Loki, why would you let him do this?" Natasha demanded, Loki sniffled and looked up.  
"Because I love Tony. I'll do anything to make him happy, which none of you can understand."  
Bruce ran and hugged Loki, he felt tears going through the fabric of his shirt, "It's okay Loki, you can cry. You deserve to, after all he's put you through."

Thor, Steve, Clint, and Tony were left alone in the bathroom. Clint broke the silence, "What the fuck made him do this Tony?"  
Tony looked scared, "Nothing I know of."  
Steve spoke next, "It had to be something to make him do that."  
"Shut it Captain." Tony replied angerly, "Why don't you just go to Loki and fuck him! I'm sure that'll make everything better!"  
Thor, Steve, and Clint were extremely confused. "Why would I do that?" Steve asked, Tony was fuming.  
"Because he's cheating on me with you! It's dead obvious! He denies it to!"  
"You're cheating on him with Pepper, so even if he was it's not any better than you!" Clint screamed, Thor still was dead silent.  
"I'M ONLY WITH HER BECAUSE SHE'S NOT FAT, UGLY, AND A BITCH! HE DOESN'T COME CLOSE TO DESERVING ME!"  
Thor suddenly punched Tony so hard he fell to the floor, Thor grabbed him by the collar and hoisted him up. "DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT ABOUT LOKI! HE'S MY BROTHER! HE'S PERFECT! AND DESERVES A HUNDRED TIMES BETTER THAN THE FILTH THAT YOU ARE!"  
"Thor, put him down." Thor looked behind him, Loki was in the bathroom's doorway with Natasha and Bruce.  
"WHY BROTHER! He deserves nothing close to you!" Thor screamed back, Loki lightly smiled.  
"Your only saying that because you're my brother, and I love him. Please."  
Thor dropped Tony to the floor, he rose up. "I'm leaving! Where's Pepper!?" Clint blocked the doorway, a frown gracing his features.  
"She snuck at earlier, too bad." Clint smirked, Natasha spoke up.  
"We have something to show you. JARVIS, show them the footage you showed us earlier."  
"Yes mam."  
Thor, Clint, and Steve shed tears at the video, those few hours were hell to Loki. "You sick bastard." Steve said under his breath, he wiped his tears.  
"No good ASSHOLE!" Clint screamed while crying, "Why would you do that to him!" Natasha hugged him, trying her best to comfort him.  
Thor shed a tear, "Loki, why...Why would you let him do this?" He asked his brother dumbstruck, Loki faintly smiled again.  
"Because I love him, and I deserve it."  
"No one deserves that Loki!" Steve screamed out suddenly, Clint nodded.  
"How long has this been going on Stark?" Thor demanded, Tony stayed silent.  
"A year and a half." Loki muttered, everyone was shocked.  
"But why!?" Clint screamed, Loki slowly looked to stare Clint in the eyes.  
"That's a long story to tell." Loki said wiping a stray tear from his eye, "A very long story."


	3. AUTHORS NOTE

This is an author's note, by me. FalconPunchTime.  
I thank everyone for the awesome reviews and sorry about the lack of updating. I have TONS of school work and my power has yet to return from Hurricane Sandy. I have a generator which is how I'm writing this right now.

Thanks for all the nice reviews, this is only my third posted fan fic I've posted. So I am relitively new to this universe. I do write original fiction too, F.Y.I. So I am young and unexperianced in a way, but everyone is at some point.

I honestly expected to get some bad reviews, and I honestly ignore them. But you don't have to read my fan fic if you don't like it. Don't leave a nasty review about how I made your favourite Avengers character an asshole or anything. It's my story, lighten up.

Thanks again for all the followers, readers, and reviewers. I really appreciate all of this. Have an awesome day, week, month and year! I'll try to update as soon as I get power and am not running on a few hours worth of generator.

Love and Rawrs,  
FalconPunchTime


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